- Mom: Have you ever wanted to go to Turkey?
- Me: Oh, yeah. I want to go to Istanbul and call it Constantinople the whole goddamn time we're there.
- Mom: Sounds like a plan, honey.
Recovering from having your midsection sliced open isn’t the easiest thing to do, especially since so many involuntary actions require your abs to do a ton of work. Things like coughing, sneezing, hiccuping, or even stretching as I wake up have become terrifying events to be avoided at all costs.
The worst thing? Laughing. Mom and I usually make a habit of laughing a lot when we’re together. But this time, we have to be so careful that one of us doesn’t send the other into a fit of giggles because then I end up crying from the pain (which also hurts).
It’s getting super boring to just be stuck in my house all day, and I really want to have my friends come over and visit, but I don’t think that’s a good idea until I can laugh at least a little bit. Otherwise, I may actually bust a gut.
First REAL meal since I had the surgery. My awesome coworker Joe made the red sauce, and my mom (who is the best living cook I know) cannot stop gushing about how awesome it is. “This is like a restaurant sauce!” “And I thought I was a good cook! My sauce is nowhere near this good!” Thanks a million, Joe.